2024 was a tumultuous year for us, to say the least.
It started off fairly normal – me and Melissa working, the kids going to school, living our normal routine. However, in the background of that routine was a feeling that we weren’t doing what we were ultimately supposed to do. We both had jobs that we kind of liked, but we knew they weren’t “our calling” or our purpose. The jobs paid the bills (mostly), but we knew deep down inside that God had something else. We didn’t know what that was (we still don’t), but the feeling remained. In the meantime, we lived our lives and we were happy, for the most part. Our marriage was great, our relationship with our kids was really good, and we found an awesome church that was a perfect fit for us.
We were living like most American Christians live. Going through the motions, living through the routine, chasing after what we have been taught all our lives to be the “American dream”.
But, that’s not what God teaches us.
We got so busy chasing after that American dream, we didn’t realize that what we were taught and indoctrinated in since we were kids, was really a trap.
It is difficult for us humans to break the years of indoctrination, brainwashing and incantation that has been done to us all our lives. Thankfully, we have the Lord. He alone has the antidote, He can teach us a new, better way, only He can break the spell.
He was doing that in us, as we began walking with Him again, and desiring for Him to show us what He had planned for us. We knew God had a bigger plan and purpose for us, but it felt like there was no safe way to jump off the merry-go-round.
Then, March 10th happened and our lives were flipped upside-down.
God found our exit for the job-school-American Dream, busy-ness carousel we were on, but it wasn’t pretty and it wasn’t at all what we were expecting. Like I’ve said before, the last thing I/we were thinking was going to interrupt our lives was a stroke. I guess all interruptions are unexpected, but this one completely blind-sided us.
For sure, this was a drastic wake up call, a shocking and abrupt departure from life as we knew it. Thankfully, God doesn’t ask our permission to give us these wake up calls, nor does He ask us what we want them to be, because I don’t know if we would have agreed to this if He did. But, He knows best. He knew this was the bucket of ice-cold water to the face that we needed.
Once the dust settled after my stroke and I was back home and in my right mind (mostly), we realized that our lives would and could never be the same. Melissa came to that conclusion before I did, but now we were both on the same page. Even if I did make a 100% recovery and I was able to go back to my job, I don’t think I wanted to, or could. God took us out of the “rat race” and we had no desire of rejoining. We just want to be used by Him. We have no idea what that means, or what that looks like, but we know that He will show us. We just have to be patient.
After a life altering event like my stroke, our priorities predictably and obviously changed. The material things we chased after, the titles, the keeping-up-with-the-Jones’, the careers, didn’t matter any more. We are just genuinely grateful that we are all alive and together, and we ultimately knew that God was going to take care of us and see us through this situation.
And He has.
He has provided for us and helped us in ways that we could not have thought of or dreamed of. For sure, there were times where I, especially, was freaking out about finances and the future, but Melissa was steady, confident and unwavering in her faith. She was such an inspiration and example to me. If she could take me to the hospital, stay by my bedside, deal with the doctors and nurses, and take care of the house and kids, all without knowing if I would leave her a widow, then I could certainly handle this.
We have been tested in ways that we have never been tested in before.
God has shown Himself faithful in areas we have never seen before.
Our faith has grown and been refined in situations and circumstances that we never even thought of before.
We know that God isn’t doing this for nothing. We know that He is preparing us, strengthening us and teaching us for what He has for us in the future. It’s easy to lose sight of that, to get caught up in the cares of this world and forget that we’re only passing through. But, He has a plan and a purpose for your suffering. He is training you, He is refining you and removing any dross you have in your life so that you can be used by Him to minister to others.
